TANTRIC BDSM AND ITS BENEFITS TO YOU

For many, TANTRA conjures up images of cross legged hippies staring fixedly into space awakening the kundalini whilst BDSM invokes a nether world of naked floggings, rubber knickers, gimp masks and handcuffs.
To stereotype these practises and ignore the rich possibilities each has to bring to our intimate relationships is to limit the nature of our sexuality.

Tantra - Mindful Sex. Present Sex.

I like to think of tantra as a sexual discipline where we teach our mind and body to be at one with our partner's mind and body.
In an age where our heads are full of white noise, stress, shame and guilt, it is more important than ever that we learn to connect with our lovers on a deeper level so as not to lose the intimacy and love that is vital to life. Thinking about the shopping list is not going to cut it.
Central to tantra is respect and worship. We may 'love' our partners and ourselves, but do we wholeheartedly embrace this power when making/creating love? Do we show full respect to our lovers and our own body, worshipping each part and pleasuring it with wonder? Isn't that what we all want from a lover? Complete and utter worship? That is tantra - clear and present sex - and we can all practice it and reap its benefits, simply by bestowing complete adoration and attention when lovemaking.

B D S M - Bondage. Discipline. Dominant. Submissive. Sado. Masochism.

Central to BDSM is the play of power between lovers. Most of us have practised this in some form or other within our relationships, whether it is by simply assuming a more submissive or dominant role in the bedroom or by actual role-play such as boss/secretary, teacher/student, nurse/patient etc. Taking on an unequal but complimentary role can be intensely exciting and forms the basis of the sexual fantasies that fuel our desires.
Pain and Pleasure are so closely entwined and can be as subtle as a passionate, hard kiss or as extreme as hard whack on the arse. It can form a small part of your sexual repertoire or have you involved in a like minded community of fetishists and players. What is so gratifying about BDSM practise is that it involves informed consent between lovers. It creates language, communication, thought, planning and preparation. It is the foreplay of unbelievably hot sex. It is mind and body together in the present moment.

Whether you're aware of it or not, you have more than likely incorporated both TANTRA and BDSM into your lovemaking at some point. Fully exploring and opening yourself to the possibilities of each will deepen your sexuality, improve your relationships, give you confidence and sexual power.

Our final Tantra & BDSM for Couples Class is being held on Saturday October 28th. Places are limited so book here now.

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HOW TO TURN A WOMAN INTO A SMOKIN HEAP OF ECSTASY..

FULL POST HERE

1. PENIS THRUSTS

After you've pleasured her with hours of foreplay, it's time to punish her with some expert thrusting.

In the missionary position, her legs wide and beckoning, keep your concentration and thrust as follows:-

9 shallow 1 deep

8 shallow 2 deep 

7 shallow 3 deep

etc until 1 shallow 9 deep

and then reverse.

9 deep 1 shallow

8 deep 2 shallow etc.

Great for prolonged ecstasy and massages nearly all the erogenous zones of the penis and vagina.

2. EXPERT FOREPLAY

Stretch the skin on the pubic bone and just above the clitoris toward the navel whilst stimulating the

clit and labia with a well moistened finger or tongue. 

Alternate the stretch with pressing the skin in the opposite direction toward the clit once in a while.

Satisfaction guaranteed.

3. ON THE BRINK

As she approaches orgasm ease off a little and tease. 

Keep the stimulation to a level where her arousal is high but not towards the point of no return.

Conversely don't ease off to the point where arousal is ebbing or she is yawning. 

Repeat this as many times as you dare and she'll be screaming for release!

And what a release.

4. PENIS MASSAGE

Best done if at least semi erect.

Have partner lie down on stomach with eyes closed or blindfolded.

Gently rub cock back and forth across the back of the knee.

Grabbing ankle gently bring up towards knee creating crease and thrust in the crease. Do both legs. Massage bottom of the feet, calves and backs of thighs up to crease.

Next do same with the insides of elbows, then palms, forearms, upper arms and armpits.

Progress to nape of neck, collarbone, up and down spine etc.

Ask your partner to flip over and gently caress her forehead, eyebrows, eyes , nose , ears and chin with your cock.

Rub yor cock featherlight across her lips..........

From here on is left to your own interpretation though if you wish to continue the tease, nipples and breasts, abdomen , hips and beyond are all fantastic!

CONTINUED HERE..

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Notes from 'How To Thrill A Man Part 1'

At July 30's 'How To Thrill A Man Part 1' workshop, fifteen women came together and were sexually empowered. Together, tantrica Layla and Passionfruit founder Michelle, explored all the senses, discovered every body part and gave all the ideas, confidence and tools to allow a woman to fully emerge in to her sexuality. For those who could not attend, we have summarised the key points for you. Book now for Part 2


Part 1
To fully embrace her sexual power, to be a confident, passionate and talented lover, a woman must WANT it. She must own her sexuality, take time with it and absolutely revere her own and her lover’s body.
To ease in to lovemaking and to build arousal, there are some wonderful tantric pleasure points to stimulate.
Starting with the back and using your breath, tongue, fingers, breasts and hair begin to lightly massage the tops of the buttocks. The area at the base of the spine and outward to the hips is a powerful tantric zone that builds fire throughout the body.
Work your way up the spine, across the shoulder blades and to the neck and ears.
The ears have a direct connection to the penis and spending at least five minutes just around this area can be a relentless tease.
The perineum, the skin between the testicles and anus is an important erogenous zone and loves to be firmly massaged.
Incorporate feathers, drip water along the spine and lick it off, massage warm oil in to the skin and use a crop or whip to stimulate the blood and bring it to the surface.
The bottom loves being lightly (or heavily) slapped and adding some dirty talk can heat things up.
Never use a heavy hand around the kidneys or along the spine. Along the shoulder blades is ok but it is generally the bottom that responds best.
Following a bit of slap, the red area loves to be soothed with a kiss or a tender touch.
Allow your lover to watch while you administer your pain/pleasure and add to the excitement even further.
Alternatively, just allow the sound of your heels walking slowly across the floor and the tap of your crop on your palm to enliven.
Make him see, hear, taste, touch and smell you.
The area around the anal passage is also full of exciting nerve endings but needs to be relaxed and coaxed into submission to be thrilled.
Just work small circles with your finger around the opening and spend time massaging and teasing. Use some oil or lubricant to further relax and when ready, you can insert a finger or toy. Accessing a man’s prostate through the rectum can be incredibly stimulating for him.
Moving to the front of the body, concentrate on nipples and the skin around the pubic bone. Pinch, squeeze, maybe add some nipple clamps and use your own body as a tool to titillate.
A simple breathing exercise is a wonderful way to prepare yourself for love when you may be tired and also when you want to connect with your lover or slow down when you do not want to climax.
Hold your left and over your heart and your right over your belly. Close your eyes, breathe in and let out your breath forcefully. Repeat twice and with the third breath, hold it in your belly for 10 seconds and follow it back up your body and slowly out of your mouth.



Part 2
Self pleasure is the self’s core responsibility. It is intrinsic to every woman’s sexuality. Loving your body, respecting and knowing it is not only our responsibility, but vital to our being a fully empowered sexual force. Using fantasy as a way to explore and elevate our orgasmic potential is also an important tool to sexual realisation. Know that whatever you need to fantasise about is OK. Give yourself permission to go wherever your depraved, weird, psycho imagination wants to go. Fantasies are not reality and have no bearing on what we may desire in real life. Sex is heart, body and mind.
Remember when you were a child and the joy and fun you had dressing up? Many men lament that their partner won’t slip into something sexy for them. You can roleplay, be sweet and innocent, dominate or just use stockings and high heels to look hot! Loosen up and play!
Sex toys can be so important in helping a woman realise her sexual potential. Use clitoral stimulators when you want to masturbate alone or as an easy and discreet addition to your lovemaking. Men love them too! Masturbate with a shaft or dual action vibrator in front of your lover to drive him wild! All men are voyeurs and will absolutely love it. It’s also the best education you can give him. Cock rings, placed at the base of the penis, are wonderful to keep a man at full attention for lengthy periods. Pressure at the base of the penis and lots of blood trapped inside his member will keep him happier for longer. The We-Vibe is a brilliant toy that stays inside the vagina and over the clitoris while you’re lovemaking. He will feel your vibrating vagina and you will feel his vibrating penis. Together with clitoral stimulation, it is a great way to feel the rhythm building at the same pace.



Part 3
Giving him the best blow job of his life will be a present that’s never forgotten, sent to the op shop or dumped in the rubbish. Layla likes to sit her honey down at the end of a hard day and treat him to 40 minutes of lingam love!!! Not the full porn star style vacuum pump but a session of intense worship. Begin by grasping the shaft firmly with your whole hand. Concentrate on the head and the frenulum. Blow over the top - use your breath to awaken him. Put the head of his penis in your mouth but don’t close your mouth just yet. Tease. Run your tongue from the bottom of the penis where the testicles meet the shaft, up along the seam to the frenulum and around the head. Encircle your tongue around the penis - around and around while you are sucking and at the head. Create a vacuum with your mouth - suck in air, hollow your cheeks and pop his penis out at the end. Use your saliva to really work up the lubrication or use a warming oil for added fun. Gently pop his testicles in to your mouth and suck gently. Use your hands and fingers to simultaneously stroke the perineum, the nipples and yourself! Change positions so he can see your butt, your breasts, and more importantly - your eyes. Maintain eye contact as you lovingly lick him and send him to heaven and back.

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